Which gave Waver a minute to just sort of...put his head in his hands and breathe slowly rather than start screaming. It all made him sick to think about--the recollection alone was already enough to feel nauseating, and piled on top of the confirmation that another worldline was...not wrong necessarily, but twisted in so critical a way. In a cosmic sense, the discrepancy was so minor that he doubted it would matter. But as far as Waver himself was concerned it was...unthinkable.
It wasn't fair, but when did the universe ever give a shit about what was fair or not?
Ritsuka does take her time. And she's not even snooping, either. She just, well, she can recognize when someone's going through a lot. It's a pretty familiar feeling for her, after all.
That said, there's only so long she can reasonably stall, so after a few moments she comes back out and wordlessly takes her seat again. Your call, Waver.
He said that with a slow, quiet sigh--as long as they were retreading some of his worst memories, he might as well have committed. Straightening up somewhat with a look of deep exhaustion, he gestured vaguely to the cane leaning against his chair.
"Cost me a lot more than he was worth, and I can't really blame him for hating me enough to send Berserker after us. But it's not like there's ever much choice, when it comes to two mages meeting each other in combat."
That certainly explains a lot. And isn't that surprising, considering...
"I don't know exactly what happened originally, but in the singularity you tried to save him by talking him into abandoning the Holy Grail War and leaving. The Doctor even pointed out after that making changes in the singularity wouldn't change what actually happened. But I never thought there was anything wrong with that."
It had meant making some detours that were probably not strictly necessary, but Ritsuka hadn't minded. Sometimes you just had to try your best rather than letting things happen in front of you.
"Like he'd ever listen to me." Waver said with a scoff that was halfway to a derisive laugh. "I'd have to be a much better liar than I am to sell that one, so congratulations to my bleeding heart other self."
...There may have been something slightly bitter to that.
"But...well, even if it amounted to nothing, I know I wouldn't just let people die in front of me if I can help it. Even that complete bastard."
"Well, he was also an idiot, so that does make sense. But it sounds terribly futile, if it really would all amount to nothing. If it were me looking at a situation like that..."
Waver shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck uneasily.
"...It's selfish, but I think I would want to know whether things could have been different. If a better outcome was ever going to be possible, or if the whole ordeal was doomed to burn to the ground from the start. So I can see what he was probably thinking--a mad endeavor to help everyone, even if it ultimately helped no one but myself."
"If it's something that helps you, that still means it helped someone, doesn't it?"
Ritsuka's just going to throw that thought out there. But really, she doesn't have a good answer, either. This stuff is, well, complicated, to say the least.
"I don't really know all the details, but I guess sometime before the Fourth Fuyuki Holy Grail War, Angra Mainyu, All the World's Evil, got to the grail and corrupted it. That's why instead of granting the winner's wish when it manifested, it cause destruction instead, I think."
Ritsuka's a bit fuzzier on the technical grail war stuff, since she's never been particularly interested in the ritual. But she at least remembers this bit of information coming up.
"What th--the incantation's not supposed to be taken literally-"
I shall be all the good in the world. I shall defeat all evil in the world. When he'd spoken those words ten years ago, how was he supposed to know that would ever actually be the situation he found himself in? More to the point--destabilizing the system was one thing, but what if something as unthinkably powerful a concept as the concept of evil actually did manifest fully? Even a fraction of it had burned the residential district to ash, this really could be the whole world at stake like he'd suspected.
"... So that part's probably the same in your world, huh?"
She'd guessed as much when he asked about whether anyone had figured out what was wrong with the grail. But it would probably be a good idea to confirm, anyway. Part of the point of this was to sort out the differences between the timelines they knew, wasn't it?
"...I can't say with absolute certainty whether or not that's the case." he admitted, knowing damn well it sounded like wishful thinking. "But given what I saw back then and what it resulted in? Yeah, I would be willing to believe the problem is that bad."
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Like the kings' little drinking party. Which, while amusing, isn't really terribly relevant or important here.
But, now that she's pretty much given all the info she has, and seeing as she is kinda still hungry...
"You said there's extra?" She'll just, y'know. Grab her plate and go to get seconds. And maybe be in no particular hurry about it.
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Which gave Waver a minute to just sort of...put his head in his hands and breathe slowly rather than start screaming. It all made him sick to think about--the recollection alone was already enough to feel nauseating, and piled on top of the confirmation that another worldline was...not wrong necessarily, but twisted in so critical a way. In a cosmic sense, the discrepancy was so minor that he doubted it would matter. But as far as Waver himself was concerned it was...unthinkable.
It wasn't fair, but when did the universe ever give a shit about what was fair or not?
"...fuck."
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That said, there's only so long she can reasonably stall, so after a few moments she comes back out and wordlessly takes her seat again. Your call, Waver.
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He said that with a slow, quiet sigh--as long as they were retreading some of his worst memories, he might as well have committed. Straightening up somewhat with a look of deep exhaustion, he gestured vaguely to the cane leaning against his chair.
"Cost me a lot more than he was worth, and I can't really blame him for hating me enough to send Berserker after us. But it's not like there's ever much choice, when it comes to two mages meeting each other in combat."
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"I don't know exactly what happened originally, but in the singularity you tried to save him by talking him into abandoning the Holy Grail War and leaving. The Doctor even pointed out after that making changes in the singularity wouldn't change what actually happened. But I never thought there was anything wrong with that."
It had meant making some detours that were probably not strictly necessary, but Ritsuka hadn't minded. Sometimes you just had to try your best rather than letting things happen in front of you.
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...There may have been something slightly bitter to that.
"But...well, even if it amounted to nothing, I know I wouldn't just let people die in front of me if I can help it. Even that complete bastard."
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Kayneth was not nearly as clever as he liked to think he was, a fact that had worked to their advantage.
"And yeah, even if it wouldn't change things in the end, it's better than doing nothing, I think."
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Waver shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck uneasily.
"...It's selfish, but I think I would want to know whether things could have been different. If a better outcome was ever going to be possible, or if the whole ordeal was doomed to burn to the ground from the start. So I can see what he was probably thinking--a mad endeavor to help everyone, even if it ultimately helped no one but myself."
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Ritsuka's just going to throw that thought out there. But really, she doesn't have a good answer, either. This stuff is, well, complicated, to say the least.
"Was there anything else you wanted to know?"
Or to tell her, for that matter.
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He asked hesitantly, hand pressed to his head in a mixture of exhaustion and frustration.
"Even Irisviel doesn't know for sure, and all I remember is some godforsaken cursed something running all over the place before Fuyuki caught fire."
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So very much not a good thing to have manifest. At all.
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What.
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Ritsuka's a bit fuzzier on the technical grail war stuff, since she's never been particularly interested in the ritual. But she at least remembers this bit of information coming up.
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I shall be all the good in the world. I shall defeat all evil in the world. When he'd spoken those words ten years ago, how was he supposed to know that would ever actually be the situation he found himself in? More to the point--destabilizing the system was one thing, but what if something as unthinkably powerful a concept as the concept of evil actually did manifest fully? Even a fraction of it had burned the residential district to ash, this really could be the whole world at stake like he'd suspected.
...Sometimes, Waver hated being right.
"Fucking hell."
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She'd guessed as much when he asked about whether anyone had figured out what was wrong with the grail. But it would probably be a good idea to confirm, anyway. Part of the point of this was to sort out the differences between the timelines they knew, wasn't it?
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"I think that's pretty much all I know, then." Unless there's something else he can think of to ask that wouldn't occur to him.